These Foolish Things

Tune: These Foolish Things

A pair of boobies in a loose brassiere,
A cunt that twitches like a moose's ear,
A dirty rubber in my glass of beer,
These foolish things remind me of you.

To get it in you need some Vaseline,
To get it out you need a towing machine,
A douche bag filled with gasoline,
These foolish things remind me of you.

A naked photograph of Liberace,
The smile you show when I say, "Such a hotche,"
Syphilitic scars that make your face so blotchy,
These foolish things remind me of you.

A running sore beside an open hole,
A Kotex floating in my toilet bowl,
A pubic hair on my breakfast roll,
These foolish things remind me of you.

Lipstick traces on an old French letter,
A dose of 'you-know-what' that won't get better,
And when I piss it stings,
These foolish things remind me of you.

The dirty panties in the cracked washbasin,
The broken jerry that I washed my face in,
The bed with creaking springs,
These foolish things remind me of you.

When I awoke upon the morning after,
I saw your tits and pissed myself with laughter,
Oh, how the left one swings,
These foolish things remind me of you.

The birth control book with its well worn pages,
The contraceptive which comes off in stages,
Oh, how my foreskin stings,
These foolish things remind me of you.

Keywords: sex