One-Eyed Riley

Tune: One-Eyed Riley

When I was sitting by the fire,
(or: Sitting in O'Riley's bar one day)
Drinking whiskey, passing water,
Suddenly A thought come to my mind,
I'd like to fuck O'Riley's daughter.

CHORUS:
Giddy-eye-eye, giddy-eye-oh
Giddy-eye-eye, for the one-eyed Riley,
Rough 'em up, stuff em up, balls and all,
Hey jig-a-jig-eye-oh.
(Play it on your old base drum)

Her hair was black, her eyes were blue,
The Colonel, the Major, and the Captain sought her,
The regimental goat and the drummer boy too,
But they never had a fuck with O'Riley's daughter.

Jack O'Flanagan is my name,
I'm the king of copulation,
Drinking beer my claim to fame,
Fucking women my occupation.

Walking through the town one day,
Who should I meet but O'Riley's daughter,
Never a word to her did say,
But "Don't you think we really 'oughter?"

Up the stairs and into bed,
There I cocked my left leg over,
Marianne was smiling then,
Smiling still when the fuck was over.

Fucked her till her tits were flat,
Filled her up with soapy water,
She won't get away with that,
If she doesn't have twins then she really 'oughter.

Suddenly footsteps on the stairs,
Old man Riley bent on slaughter,
Bloody great pistol in his hand,
Looking for the one who fucked his daughter.

He fired the pistol at my head,
Missed me by an inch and quarter,
Hit his daughter Marianne,
Right in the place where she passes water.
I grabbed O'Riley by the hair,
Shoved his head in a bucket of water,
Rammed his pistol up his ass,
A damn sight quicker than I fucked his daughter.

Old man Riley's dead and gone,
Shall we bury him? Not fucking likely,
We'll nail him to the shithouse door,
And there we'll bugger him twice nightly.

Come you virgins, maidens fair,
Answer me quick and true not slyly.
Do you want it straight and square,
Or the way I gave it to one eyed Riley?

Keywords: Irish, sex