I'll Never Piss Again

Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic

My dick has felt the burning of the coming of the clap,
I've been clean all these years and now I've got a real bum rap,
That bitch said she was clean but she really was a liar,
'Cause now my dick's on fire.

CHORUS :
Lordy, Lordy I'm on fire
Lordy, Lordy I'm on fire
Lordy, Lordy I'm on fire
And I'll never piss again

I saw her coming at me from across the Georgia bar
Her ass was swinging wildly and her tits were sagging far
I propped her on a barstool and I bought that bitch a drink
Then I smelled that telltale stink

Chorus

Swedish Bees, Kamikazes, Stolies, and some brew
My dick was getting hard, Man, the big old Wally grew
She reached into my pants and she pulled that monster out
Then John Cleveland began to shout

Chorus

Well I should have listened to him 'cause he'd been with her before
That must have been where he got that bloody festered sore
I should have listened to him when he said she was a whore
But you knows "Bo needs more"

Chorus

So I took her on a hash run and that bitch ran fast and hot
You could almost see the nasty stuff a-dripping out her slot
And at the On-In, she told me she really wanted to fuck
But I should have just let her suck

Chorus

Now I'm in the doctor's office sitting in the chair
Nothing like a red hot poker way down deep in there
The doctor pushed too far and my scrotum began to tear
God, this really SUCKS

 

Keywords: sex, genitals, disease, drink