Dinah-Moe-Humm

From: Frank Zappa

I couldn't say where she's cummin from.
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe-Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a fifty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
Y'jes can't do it!

She made a bet with her sister who's a little dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
So I got down to it.

I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum.

I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didn't no Dinah-Moe-Humm, Dinah-Moe-Humm.

Dinah-Moe-Humm
Dinah-Moe-Humm
Where's this Dinah-Moe
Cummin from?
Done spent three hours
An' I ain't got a crumb
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe,
From the Dinah-Moe-Humm.

I got a spot thats gets me hot
But you ain't been to it.
I got a spot thats gets me hot
But you ain't been to it.
I got a spot thats gets me hot
But you ain't been to it.
I got a spot thats gets me hot
But you ain't been to it.

'Cause I can't get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta get out of it
Before I can get into it
'Cause I never get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta be out of it
To get myself into it

(She looked over at me with a glazed eye and some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area and she said...)

Just get me wasted
An' you're halfway there
'Cause if my mind's tore up
Then my body don't care.

I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An' said, "My-my-my,"
What sort of thing
Upon which this lady might get high?

The fifty dollar bill didn't matter no more,
When her sister got naked on the floor,
She said that Dinah-Moe might win the bet,
But she could use some fuckin' if I wasn't done yet.

I told her ...
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldn't give her a try.

So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs in the air
An' asked if she had any cooties in there.

Whaddya mean cooties?
No cooties on me!

She was buns up neelin'
Buns up!
I was wheelin' an' dealin',
Wheelin' an' dealin' ah ooooooh!
She surrendered to the feelin'
She sweetly surrendered,
And she started in to squeelin'.

Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of he bed,
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red,
Some drool rollin' down
From the edge of her chin,
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered 'n quaked
An' clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
'Bout her mental health
'Till Dinah-Moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she needed
Was some discipline.

 

Keywords: zappa, sex, wager