Can't Hash Today

Tune: ???

Dear Hash I sing this song to tell you of my plight.
At the time of writing I am not a pretty sight.
Me body is all black and blue; and me face a deathly gray.
And I hope you'll understand why I can't Hash today.

I was working on the fourteenth floor, some bricks I had to clear.
And throwin' 'em down from such a height was not a good idea.
The foreman wasn't very pleased, he bein' an awful sod,
He said that I'd have to take them down the ladder in me hod.

Now shiftin' all them bricks by hand seemed so awful slow,
So I hoisted up a barrel and secured a rope below.
But in my haste to do the job, I was too blind to see,
That a barrel full of buildin' bricks was heavier than me.

Now when I came down I cut the rope and the barrel fell like lead,
And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead.
I shot up like a rocket, and to my dismay I found,
That halfways up, I met the bloody barrel coming down.

Now the barrel broke me shoulder as to the ground it sped.
And when I reached the top I struck the pulley with me head,
I still clung on though numbed and shocked from this almighty blow,
And the barrel spilled out half the bricks fourteen floors below.

Now when the bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor,
I then outweighed the barrel and they started up once more.
Clinging tightly to the rope as I headed for the ground,
And I fell among the broken bricks that were scattered all around.

As I lay there moaning on the ground, I thought I passed the worst,
And the barrel struck the pulley wheel and didn't the bottom burst.
A shower of bricks came down on me, sure I didn't have a hope,
And as I was losing consciousness, I let go the bloody rope.

Now the barrel being heavier started down once more,
And landed right across me as I lay there on the floor.
I broke three ribs and me left arm, and I can only say,
That I hope you understand why I can't hash today.

 

Keywords: Irish, mason, work, hash